to my maybe soulmate,
I am beginning to believe that soul mates are never supposed to be together. Maybe they come into your life to teach you a lesson, or to give you hope, or to put a twist in one of your chapters of life. You my friend, my never lover, have taught me one thing. You’ve taught me to be grateful for who I am. I am thankful to be carefree, the lost soul you’ve judge me for.. the wildflower. I may not have morals to your standards or an equally clean slate, but that doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of love and success in life. That doesn’t make me any less wanted or pure or clean. It doesn’t make me worn, dirty or stained. It all makes me me. It binds together the mismatched fails, successes, and adventures, me. And even though you would change those things about me, you taught me that I wouldn’t. And I can thank you for that.
From your not so perfect dream girl
A little about me:
I am a 25-year-old, energetic, adventure lover. I have been in school for far longer than I would like to admit, but will finally be graduating in 2017 with a major in Sociology and a minor in Psychology. Sociology is quite fascinating and not just an easy elective like people like to think. Studying it has really opened my eyes to why the world works the way it does. I consider myself an introverted extrovert, which I think would surprise a lot of people because most people know me as the girl with the big white teeth and the obnoxious laugh. I am a dance teacher, a member of the Rider Cheer Team and the co-coach of the U of R Dance Team.
Few things people don’t know about me:
-I will be applying to do an after degree in education. It took me way too long to figure out that teaching and children were what I am passionate about, but I’m happy I got here!
-I am in recovery from an eating disorder. I say in recovery instead of recovered because it is something I will probably struggle with for the rest of my life. Unlike other mental illnesses like alcoholism or a drug addiction where the substance that is causing the issue can be eliminated from the person’s life, food cannot be. I don’t like to talk about this, because I like the positive view that people have of me, and I never want something like this to distort that, but at the same time, I think it is important for me too because I want to be a role model. I want people to understand that mental illness doesn’t mean you are broken, or unloveable or imperfect, it makes you a survivor, it makes you stronger and it makes you perfectly imperfect.
-I hope to one day write a book about my struggles in hope you inspire and encourage people to push through their struggles, and to know that anything they’re going through will only make them stronger in the end.
Thoughts on society’s concept of beauty:
I think society has created this unreachable concept of beauty, but I think our generation is doing a good job of changing it. There are so many amazing people out there now a day, standing up against this mould that has been created. I think beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, colours, ages, genders, races etc. I think everyone is beautiful in their own way and it’s just sad that society can’t acknowledge this. I think it’s so so so important to love yourself first, because if you love yourself, then there’s no way you’ll ever let society tell you you’re not good enough.
Most valuable lesson I’ve learnt so far:
I think the most important lesson I’ve learnt is to love yourself first. I spent way too many years trying to be someone I wasn’t, trying to be the person I thought I had to be to make people like me, but in reality if those people didn’t like me for who I truly was, then those people didn’t deserve to be part of my life anyway. I would love to get the years and the sleepless nights back of wishing I was someone else, and that I had a different life, because now that I’m finally happy with myself and with my life, I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Advice for others:
Never ever ever ever ever let anyone tell you you’re not good enough or make you feel like you need to change. Each and every one of us is unique for a reason and each of us deserves to be surrounded by people who will accept and cherish this about us.