I found this article while working my night shift tonight and I thought it was pretty interesting. Unfortunately, I don’t have a partner to ask these questions to, but I thought it would be cool to ask them to myself.
Here’s the original article: “40 Questions To Ask Your Partner About Love That Are Really Hard To Answer, But Will Make Your Connection Even Stronger”
1. How do you know when you love someone?
I think everyone knows they love someone a little differently. Since I am already a very generous and caring person, I think I may feel love differently than other people. Is it too cliche to say: you just know? Because I think when you love someone or you fall in love with another person, you just know.
2. Is romantic love the most important love of all?
I personally don’t think so. I mean romance is awesome, but I think there are other types of love that are more important. For me, I would rather someone take time out of their busy schedule to spend time with me than to buy me flowers or give me some kind of gift.
3. Do you think once you love someone, you will ALWAYS love them? Or do you think love can fade away with time?
I think this is where people get love wrong. I believe love is something you constantly have to work on and continue to keep strong. In many relationships, people think the love they originally have, will be the love they have forever, but love fades, love changes, love is stronger at some points of a relationship and weaker at other parts, and that’s where the couple needs to see eye to eye in continuing to build on and keep that love strong.
4. What’s the first thing you notice about someone when you fall for them?
This one is hard for me to answer. I have told three separate people in my life that I was in love with them, and all three kinds of love I felt were completely different. Does that mean I was never truly in love? Maybe. Or maybe the love I share with different people is exactly that, different. I think the first thing I notice about someone when I fall in love with them, is how they love themselves and how they love those around them.
5. What’s one thing about love that scares you?
The one thing about love that scares me is not knowing if the person’s love they have for me is the same feeling I have for them.
6. Do you believe in love at first sight?
I used to. I think I now believe in love at first connection. It’s easy to have an attraction or lust for another person, but I think it’s the connection that you feel with that other person is what’s the most important.
7. Which do you agree with? Love should always feel comfortable, or love should always feel new and exciting?
I think love should feel comfortable. I think we should all feel at home with the person we love, and we should be able to be completely ourselves with no judgement.
8. What do you think makes people in love?
I think there are many aspects that make two people fall in love. Having a connection both physically and mentally. Allowing yourself to open up. Spending time together. Having that person there for you in good and bad moments of your life. Allowing them to be a part of your personal and family life. Seeing and talking about a future with them.
9. What makes you fall out of love?
Again there are probably many aspects that make two people fall out of love. Dishonesty, lost trust, an unequal effort being put into the relationship, different views on important things in life and not being able to find a compromise, jealousy. For me, I think the moment I no longer feel like I can trust the person I love, would be when I would start to fall out of love.
10. Do you believe people can change if they love someone?
I definitely think people can change while loving another person, but I don’t think you should ever build a relationship on the assumption that one or both people in the relationship are going to change.
11. Do you think knowing whether or not it’s love depends on how long you’ve known the person?
No. I definitely don’t think so. I think there are couples that know right away if they’re going to fall in love with each other (shout out to my besties Nic and Matt), but there are also couples that take more time to find that same love.
12. How long do you think it takes before you know you love someone?
For me personally, I’m not sure. I get love and lust confused all the time. I definitely love people easily, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I am IN love with them. I think when I finally find the right person, I will know.
13. Would you still be able to love someone after they’ve been unfaithful?
I personally don’t think so. I have been the ‘side chick’ in way too many situations. I have seen many men disrespect their girlfriends and wives. I think it would take me a lot of time and effort to rebuild the same amount of love and trust I had.
14. What constitutes cheating/unfaithfulness for you?
I think a person knows if they are cheating or being unfaithful. Obviously any physical act with another person, but I think verbally talking or texting another person could be cheating as well. If it’s something you feel like you have to hide from your partner, you’re being unfaithful.
15. What’s worse an emotional affair or a physical one?
I think they are pretty equal in my eyes. If a person is seeking either of those things from another person, they are clearly lacking it in the relationship they are in.
16. If you love someone, is unfaithfulness/cheating something that can be forgiven?
Like I said above, maybe with time. But I think it would be hard for me.
17. When it comes to cheating, forgive and forget, forgive but don’t forget, or don’t forgive at all?
I think the only way to move forward in that relationship would be to forgive and forget, if you can’t do that, I think it would be hard to continue a relationship with that person.
18. Do you believe love changes you?
I think the right love would push you to change in positive ways. For example to be the best version of yourself, but never stray from the person you truly are. I think love changes me in a good way. It gives me the confidence to be myself and helps me remember I deserve to be loved and to love myself.
19. Do you think people should change themselves to find love?
No, no, no, no, no, nooooo.
20. What do you think is the most important factor of keeping love alive in a relationship?
To keep love alive, I think both sides have to continue to work on the relationship. That doesn’t always mean giving equally because sometimes one partner may need more support than the other, but it means being okay with that. Continuing to push each other, believing in each other dreams and making sacrifices.
21. Would you rather have EXTRAORDINARY love that doesn’t last forever, or ordinary love that does?
Hmmmm. Tough one. Shouldn’t all love be extraordinary? I don’t just want ordinary love. I want the type of love that makes me smile just thinking about it. The kind of love people can feel when they are around my partner and me. So I guess the first answer and then I’ll just turn into a crazy dog lady when it ends.
22. Do you think the way your family loves has affected the way you love?
It definitely does. It’s a psychological fact. The way you were treated growing up and the love you saw in your parents or from your family around you, definitely has an effect on not only the way you love but how you view love.
23. Who is one couple you know that you admire in terms of love?
My parents and the way my dad has stood beside my mother through thick and thin (more thin than thick).
24. Do you believe you can be friends with someone you loved in the past?
I think so. It may take time but I do think it’s possible. I think both people have to be over their romantic feelings for the other person though.
25. What makes a relationship healthy?
Equality in all aspects. Openness and trust. Being able to say: “I’m sorry” and mean it. Understanding that you will sometimes have to make sacrifices and put the other person first.
26. What’s more important physical connection, or emotional?
I think both are very important and I think both are connected. I think having sex with someone who you have an emotional connection with is way better.
27. Is sex more of a physical connection for you, or emotional?
For me, it’s both. It’s very hard for me to not get an emotional connection with someone I have sex with.
28. Which makes you fall in love with someone more, physical attraction or a non-physical connection?
Non-physical connection. Opening up to someone or having someone open up to you is so huge.
29. Have you ever loved someone who you hoped would change for you?
Oh ya, probably way too many times. I think we’ve all experienced this (except maybe a few of the lucky ones). Take it from me, IT NEVER WORKS.
30. Have you ever changed yourself to make someone love you?
I’ve definitely tried, but again IT NEVER WORKS. I’ve learnt to save myself from disappointment and heartache and just be myself.
31. If you had a child what’s the first thing you would teach them about love?
I think the most important way to teach children about love is not by using your words, but by showing them by the way you love and support your spouse.
32. What’s one thing about love that scares you?
Having my heart broken, because it’s already happened too many times.
33. Do you believe vulnerability is a good thing when it comes to love?
Yes, it definitely is important.
34. What is the most vulnerable way you let someone into your life?
I think the most vulnerable thing to do, is to let the other person see you in your good and bad moments of life. Let them see you when you’re on the top of the world, but also let them see you when you feel as though you’ve hit rock bottom.
35. Define love in 5 words.
40. What’s the craziest thing you’d do for love?
Move my life for my partner.